A New Kind of Birthday

It's something we'd talked about for a long time and knew we wanted to do it, we just weren't sure when or how.  We both grew up Catholic so we were originally Christened as newborns.  I liked the idea of being old enough to make the choice, but I must admit, I felt a bit "forced" into it at first.  I didn't exactly understand why we had to do full immersion Baptism--do the rituals of the Catholic Church not count when it comes to God?  Once I attended the Welcome to the Southland class, I had a better understanding of why we were doing it.

Going to Southland has literally been LIFE-CHANGING for both Josh and me.  I will be the first to say I was extremely skeptical before I entered for the first time, and the word "cult" entered my mind a few times.  I had never felt as much love and sense of belonging as I did when I walked through those doors.  There I was, standing in the middle of this massive church and yet I felt so at home.  At peace.  And I just KNEW it was God who called us there.  Soon, we couldn't stand to miss a Sunday and if we had to, we watched the service online.  It became a no-brainer once we were blessed with Ryan.

So, on Sunday, October 20 in front of about 30 family and friends, Josh and I literally took the plunge into the chilly (the heater was broken!) Baptismal at Southland.  It was so amazing and invigorating.  We walked in that water and said yes to changing our minds, hearts, and lives forever.

God has been so good to me, even after all the wrong turns, bad decisions, times I turned my back on Him, and times I've fallen flat on my face.  He has been there all along, just waiting for me to say I was ready.  This weekend, I took his outstretched hand and I hope I never let it go.

On the Day You Were Born

A large part of me doing this blog is to be an electronic journal of life.  Notebooks and papers can get lost, torn, and ruined but with a blog, I can login literally from anywhere and re-read old posts or write new ones.  On the day Ryan was born, I typed a letter to her on my iPhone as I tried desperately to keep my exhausted eyes open. I wanted Ryan to forever know how I felt on that day, and here's what I said:

8-24-13

Dear Ryan,

Today was the most amazing day of my life.  Your father and I waited anxiously by the phone last night, texting with your biological mom until about 11:30.  Then, we left Lexington and drove fast--must faster than we really should have--so we could get to the hospital in time to see you come into this world.  At 6:10 a.m. on Saturday, August 24, 2013 you entered this world and mine was forever changed.  I saw you take your first breath, heard your first cry, watched you get weighed, measured, and cleaned up.  Then, they wrapped you up like a burrito and a few moments later, you were in my arms.  The feeling I had as I looked into your beautiful face is something I can't describe.  Your perfect little lips moved open and closed as your experimented with your newly found tongue to see how it would work.  You opened your eyes for a second, only to shut them right back to block out the bright lights.  You were so beautiful.  So perfect, so soft and sweet and innocent and I knew I would do anything to protect you from harm.  Thoughts of what you'll look like, how you'll act, whether you'll like school or soccer or what you might want to be when you grow up--all of these things raced through my head when I looked at you.  Watching your dad hold you and stare into your face made my heart melt a hundred times over today.  Ryan, please know how loved you are, how wanted you are, and what an amazing and perfect gift you are to your father and me.  We already love you more than we knew was possible and we've only known you for 15 hours. :)  You have filled a part in our hearts that could never have been filled by anyone or anything else.  I love you to the moon and back.  Ryan Michelle Lynch, our perfect gift from God above.  We were meant for each other.

Love,
Your Mommy